Planning a gay wedding can go either way – your adept skills make sure everything falls into place or you divorce your future husband even before the big day arrives, very much the same way you might say “adios” after travelling as a couple for the first time.

Glenn and I got married two months ago and while it was a casual and intimate affair, there were still many things to consider. Catering, invites, photography, cake, venue – these were just a few of the essentials, even for the smallest of small weddings.

A wedding that went on forever with big speeches, the first dance and a large party wasn’t our thing. Instead, we had a low key celebration that fit our aesthetic. Our big day wasn’t dripping with jewels but but it was a special ceremony that ticked all the checkboxes. Here’s the guide to our fabulous gay wedding.

Menu

To create a relaxed atmosphere, we chose to serve canapés rather than sit-down full course meals so guests could mingle freely. There was a selection of nine hot and cold canapés including kingfish kokoda with coconut, chilli & lime, caramelised onion & gorgonzola tart, salmon & spanner crab tortellini with chive butter, white chocolate & kaffir lime mousse with mandarin.

Both the ceremony and reception were held at the Cruising Yacht Club of Australia and we wanted the beautiful Sydney Harbour location to speak for itself. Guests were greeted with flutes of Petit Cordon by Maison Mumm Prestige Brut NV the moment they arrived and we set up an open bar tab limited to wines, beers and non-alcoholic beverages. Thankfully, our guests were well-behaved!

Wedding Cake

There’s a lot to prove with wedding cakes, especially for those Instagram thirsty kids, which sadly I’m one of. Cakes can go as high as 12-tiers at extravagant receptions but of course, aesthetic is nothing if they don’t taste great.

I have a sweet tooth and could have settled for a straight up salted caramel cheesecake but we wanted our wedding cake to say sophistication. Andy Bowdy, renown for their deconstructed aesthetics and decadent flavours, was our no-brainer choice.

These guys don’t customise their cakes so we selected Grace, a carrot cake with baked cheesecake chunks, walnut, mandarin on a ginger cookie base and finished with caramel mousse and salted caramel drizzle, from their regular menu. To accentuate the gay theme, we embellished the cake with a “Mr. & Mr.” cake topper. 

Flowers

Glenn loves his flowers and decided to create our wedding floral arrangements. The day before our wedding, he got up at an ungodly hour to snap up various native wildflowers, plants and a mix of small and large flowers at the Sydney Flower Market.

We wanted something bold and rustic so the eight table floral centrepieces and two hand-carried bouquets exuded that quality. He bound the arrangements with a nautical blue and white striped ribbon to highlight the harbour location and also threw in orange roses for some good colour measure.

Outfits

Being huge Thom Browne fans, it was no question that we both adorn the designer’s suits for our big day. 

Rather than wear identical outfits, we chose suits to match our personality and the harbour location. I wore a seersucker short suit with shark embroidery while Glenn’s simple navy suit was emblazoned with Browne’s signature tri-colour stripes.

My short suit is possibly one of the most expensive items in my wardrobe but looking at photographs and reminiscing on the day itself, the money was well-spent.

I proposed to Glenn with Maison Margiela square silver signet ring that we also got married in as well. Our taste for accessories has always geared towards the masculine style so the boldness of the ring was perfect for us. Our looks were complemented with Dior Homme ‘Newave’ derby shoes and home-crafted veils, just to inject a healthy dose of femininity and frivolity. 

Make-up

Weddings are predictable events so we wanted something else that stood out apart from our dramatic veils and entrance. We both wore artisanal makeup.

While I’ve used makeup for photos before, my skills are probably that of a 5-year old kid who’s gone crazy with his or her mum’s kit. Sephora offers artists makeup application service and they sure made us looked gorgeous.

Glenn went for subtle grooming with accentuated blush on his cheeks since he wanted to look cute while my makeup artist gave me silver feathered brows, a navy dot on each eyelid and a silver dot on the bottom. We love our looks!

Music

I was besotted with ‘In The Garden’ from the Orlando movie soundtrack when I watched Thom Browne’s SS18 menswear show (sadly on YouTube rather than in person) and knew that had to be our entrance tune. The symphonic melody accentuated our dramatic walk across the pontoon, very much the same way when Browne sent down a hybrid wedding suit dress in the same presentation.

Sufjan Steven’s ‘Mystery Of Love’ and Troye Sivan’s ‘My My My’ were our other two choices. Both songs highlighted the mood and our emotions during the marriage certificate signing as well as the official husband and husband end-of-ceremony celebration. 

Daniel Tomalaris from Sydney folk rock band, St Joan, charmed our guests with acoustic renditions from Lana Del Rey, Radiohead, Crowded House, Bruce Springsteen, Selena Gomez and his original composition during the reception. 

We got married in winter because it doesn’t get bitterly cold during this season in Sydney and most days are filled with blissful sunny skies. As life would have it, this perfect weather that Glenn and I were hoping for on our wedding day decided not to show up. Instead, we were presented with ominous clouds that didn’t want to clear and passing showers that nearly ruined our plans.

Lady Luck, however, was kind enough to stop the rain just in time for our grand entrance and ceremony. If I had to be honest, I was glad the weather was gloomy as that only accentuated the drama of our photos, especially the ones of us walking in with our home-crafted veils.

Our wedding was a small, casual event but it was definitely dramatic and memorable, and that was exactly how we intended it. I couldn’t have done all this without my husband, Glenn, so thank you for making this day such a special one.

Photography by Robbie V